It’s June! Did you know that already? Because I don’t think the little hobbit in the sky who controls the weather knows that. He’s rather confusedly pressing all the October buttons instead of twizzling the June knobs. It’s cold where I am, and rainy, just like October! It’s so rainy that there are floods all over France and it’s so cold that I’ve gone back to wearing two pairs of socks (at the same time, you understand). The weather-hobbit must be drunk.
It’s a funny thing, isn’t it? Conversations about the weather? It seems to permeate every exchange from formal debates to gossipy chats. It’s unavoidable – and I don’t think it’s just a cultural thing either. The French do it just as much as the Brits and it seems to be the ‘go-to’ small-talk of every customer I meet. It would be understandable if it was just about extreme whether too, but it’s not. There are no sensible statements such as:
“Bit windy in this hurricane, ain’t it?” (ya think?)
but stupid ones, such as:
“Bit nippy,” (because it’s Juntober)
or even worse
“It’s not really hot or cold today, is it? It’s kind of inbetweeny.” (the weather-hobbit has given up entirely and gone to sleep off the booze. Bloody unreliable weather-hobbits.)
Inbetweeny!! That’s making a nothing statement about the nothingness of the weather. Baffling.
Well…perhaps not all that baffling. I do it too – talk about the weather, especially with people I don’t know well. But why? Because it’s a link, that’s why. There aren’t many things that connect strangers – at least, not many things that don’t come with a heap of controversy (like politics or religion). Talking about the weather brings people together, it’s a shared experiences and gives strangers something to chat about – something that they know without doubt that their newfound parley-partner will understand. They can join together in their weather-hobbit-bashing.
So yeah…it’s June and it’s cold and it feels like the seasons have been all shaken up (although admittedly, I wasn’t complaining at Christmas when we were in the garden in our shorts). This weather is bad for business (although hot chocolate sales aren’t doing too badly, funnily enough), this weather is bad for the washing machine (which is currently screaming “seriously, more socks?!” Yep, Wally the washing machine, I’m afraid there are more socks), and this weather isn’t so great for the bank balance either.
But do you know what it is good for? It’s good for curling up under the quilt with a good book – and therein lies a plan…
I think I’ll wait until the weather-hobbit has sorted out his drinking problem before I resurface. Happy reading 😉